Uncle Rwamiti on Friendship: “True Friends Are Useless”

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One Sunday afternoon, Uncle Rwamiti gathered his nephews under the shade of the great omutoma tree. His voice carried both thunder and laughter as he began with a shocking declaration:

“True friends are useless. Yes—useless! Not worthless, but useless.”

The young men gasped. David Mulindwa nearly choked on his roasted maize. “Uncle, how can you say such a thing? Without friends, life would be lonely!”

Rwamiti leaned on his walking stick and smiled mischievously. “Exactly, my son. But hear me well. When a friend is useful—when you keep them because they give you contracts, lend you money, or push your name into the right circles—that is not friendship. That is trade. That is a deal. And deal friends will vanish the moment the deal is no longer sweet.”

He paused, letting the words hang in the air like smoke.

“A true friend,” he continued, “is useless in that sense. He may not get you a job, he may not boost your bank account, he may not even post your picture on Facebook. But when the weight of the world is heavy on your chest, when your soul is cracked and leaking, that useless friend will sit quietly with you—no solutions, no transactions, just presence. That is the friendship that saves lives.”

The nephews were silent now. Even the birds seemed to hush.

Rwamiti tapped his stick on the ground. “Beware of deal friends. They will drink your whisky, clap at your wedding, and vanish at your funeral. But useless friends? They are like shade trees—you cannot build a house with them, but you can rest under them when the sun is merciless.”

David nodded slowly, his eyes moist. “So, Uncle, you mean that friendship is not about utility, but about loyalty of the heart?”

The old man laughed. “Now you are learning, Mulindwa! Success will bring you deal friends. But only truth, humility, and time will reveal the useless ones—the ones who stay when there is nothing left to give. Treasure them, for they are rare.”

And with that, Uncle Rwamiti tilted his head back and declared:

“Better one useless friend who sees your tears than a hundred deal friends!

:

True Friends Are Useless — Uncle Rwamiti’s Bold Lesson on Friendship

One Sunday afternoon, Uncle Rwamiti gathered his nephews under the shade of the great omutoma tree. Then he dropped a thunderbolt:

“True friends are useless. Yes—useless! Not worthless, but useless.”

The young men gasped. David Mulindwa nearly choked on his roasted maize.

“Uncle,” he protested, “how can you say such a thing? Without friends, life would be lonely!”

Rwamiti chuckled, his eyes twinkling with mischief. “Exactly, my son. But hear me well. When you keep people around because they are useful—because they give you contracts, lend you money, or push your name into the right circles—that is not friendship. That is trade. That is a deal. And deal friends will vanish the moment the deal is no longer sweet.”

He leaned on his stick and continued:

“A true friend is useless in that sense. He may not get you a job, he may not boost your bank account, he may not even post your picture online. But when the weight of the world is heavy on your chest, that useless friend will sit quietly with you—no solutions, no transactions, just presence. That is the friendship that saves lives.”

The nephews were silent. Even the birds seemed to hush.

“Beware of deal friends,” Rwamiti warned. “They will drink your whisky, clap at your wedding, and vanish at your funeral. But useless friends? They are like shade trees—you cannot build a house with them, but you can rest under them when the sun is merciless. Better one useless friend who sees your tears than a hundred deal friends who toast to your victories.”


The Lesson

In leadership, business, and life, we often confuse networks with friendships. Networks are useful—they open doors and provide opportunities. But real friendships are “useless” in the transactional sense. They give us something deeper: loyalty, safety, and the courage to be vulnerable.

It is a paradox worth remembering: the friendships that matter most are the ones you cannot measure in usefulness.


💡 Reflection for You:
Who in your life is “useless” in Uncle Rwamiti’s sense—the one who offers presence, not deals? And are you such a friend to anyone else?


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